Finding the Rhythms in Chaos (Thursday 7/16)

I once more have my regular morning wake up routine: alarm, snooze, wake up, brush teeth, pack things, and go to the office by myself! Inside of the office, I blog for the first hour to clear my mind and get my fingers moving before transitioning onto my mega Kolibri guide. The page number of this guide continues to increase and I’m at over 100+ pages at this point. Screenshots are what take up most of the space, but proves that the entire process is not the most intuitive and has too many steps in general! 

Tea time came and the three of us walked to Roza’s house around 10:30am. When I stepped outside I noticed the busted pixels on my phone got tinier! Now they’re not as noticeable and simply serve as a fun reminder of my time here in Tanzania. I was in a wonderful mood going to Roza’s house and sat down to eat. For breakfast we ate fried sweet potatoes from last night and freshly made chapati. The entire meal was wonderful as always and we drank a delicious tea to wash it down. I’ve noticed that I quite enjoy drinking a warm drink with my meal as it does genuinely help with digestion! Maybe my dad was right all those years about not drinking cold water during meals!

With the meal finished, we walked back to the office and enjoyed the warm sun. Sitting inside of the office and Roza’s house chills you since it’s usually colder inside that out! I’ve turned into a lizard at this point and need to warm up before I start working again! Eli brought out his hacky sack and I realized it had been weeks since we last played. I was quite rusty and felt like I lost the touch I had been developing. Godfrey joined in on the sacking and proved to be quite amazing. He plays a ton of soccer and those skills transfer directly over. On his first try he stalled the hacky sack on his shoe like he’d been playing for years! 

As we kicked around “the ball” as Godfrey calls it, I’d go check in on all of the examination printing Roza has been up to do. All of the printing is done in a small room towards the front of the office and is constantly pumping out thousands of sheets of printed paper a day. It’s oddly satisfying to watch the printer rapidly shoot out sheet after sheet of printed paper. The machine makes a wonderful mechanical rhythm that almost lulls you to sleep. The accuracy and speed at which the printer operates is fascinating and it’s amazing it doesn’t break more often. That machine has probably more than 100,000 sheets of paper it needs to print to finish the examinations!

After watching the printer and playing a little bit of hacky sack, I got back to work on my computer! As I add more and more to my guide, I am constantly realizing that there is more and more information that I need to add. The moment I think a section is done, I’ll go through it all and realize it needs more pictures, more organization, or simply more instructions. Every screenshot needs to be edited with large red arrows and boxes to make the concepts clear! I was in a much better mindset today than yesterday and able to stay focused and hopeful that I could get the work done despite the lack of resources. I felt invigorated!

2:30pm came around and it was time to go to lunch. 

At Roza’s we ate rice, beans, a salad, and avocados. The salad was a mix of tomatoes, cabbage, and onion that we put on top of the rice and beans to give it some extra flavor! 

When Roza was preparing it at the table, she was adding small amounts of salt at a time for taste. However, the salt shaker was clogged and having difficulties actually dispensing any significant amount of salt. To fix this problem, Roza tried to open the salt shaker causing the container to explode open and get salt everywhere. There was a ton of salt in the salad, but Roza was able to salvage it. To add salt in the wound (pun intended), when Roza sat down the salt shaker, she proceeded to spill it again and cause another large mess with the salt! It was all over the couch and floor! I felt horrible, but Roza insisted she would clean it later and have us eat.

The addition of vegetables to the rice and beans was nice and since I love salt, it tasted even better. When it came to the avocado I was hoping for a creamy and fatty addition to the meal, but it was anything but that. Either it’s the type of avocado or the fact that it wasn’t ripe, but it tasted like spoiled fish! I usually eat as much avocado as I can, but today I could hardly stomach a single slice. There are a lot of different types of avocados out here and I think that this type simply doesn’t taste as good as the others (they’re large, black avocados. The small, green ones are better)!

To add to the chaos of the meal, towards the middle of us eating Eli’s face became a bright red, put his hand over his mouth, and ran outside! Miraclin and Roza were concerned and went outside to see what was going on while I just continued eating. When he came back inside he told us that he’s okay and simply had a very bad instance of heart burn. The bite that he had taken had a large chunk of salt in it causing him to up-chuck just the tiniest bit! Roza joked that we aren’t going to be able to have beans again!

When the meal finally ended, we walked back to the office where it was time for me to teach! Today we were once more trying to set up a Kolibri server from scratch. I gave them all of the materials they could possibly need and waited for them to need my help. The micro SD card worked today unlike last time, but everything else was a pain. To make a long story short my patience dwindled quickly and I was not a compassionate teacher. As the group faced more and more problems, I quickly became very short and upset with everyone. In the moment I was baffled how the “simple” processes I taught couldn’t be replicated by a team of over 10 adults. In my mind I thought I made it pretty clear what to do. It would take them 10 minutes to figure out a username and password when it should only take two, they wouldn’t know where to click when the button was right in front of them, and wouldn’t just experiment and try things unless I told them what to do. It didn’t help that they gave the keyboard to a woman named Leah who didn’t know how to type at all and the mouse to Rapheali who had only been to a couple of my lessons and had no idea what to do. Another thing that confused me was the fact that no leader ever emerged. I would think that someone would rise above and start delegating tasks, but instead they went through.the project more communally (how they operate). 

It was a total mess, but I didn’t handle it well. I’m ashamed that I wasn’t more patient and understanding of my students. It the moment I forgot that I’ve been doing this project for over six months and know it like the back of my hand when my students have been taught for only a week and half and don’t know computers very well. I learned so many valuable lessons in that hour and a half. I realized that at the beginning of anything I’m leading or doing, I need to go in with hope and positivity to get the ball rolling in the right direction. If you start off on the right foot, it’s easier to keep getting better. When I’m in the middle of teaching, instead of seeing a problem or a lack of progress as an issue, I see it as an opportunity to slow down, and lead/teach effectively. It’s also an opportunity to fill those around me with encouragement and confidence that they can overcome and solve the problem. When it comes to the end of the activity, I can take a moment to go over what went well and what didn’t to instill excitement for the next day’s task. Of course I didn’t realize any of this until after the fact, but I know that I will bring this sentiment with me tomorrow and hopefully for the rest of my life!

By the time everything ended I was still in my frustrated haze. I told everyone I was proud of them, but was honest about how disappointed I was about how long it took. I could see the faces of my students and realized I was in the wrong. After I was done talking, I was met with the honesty and reality of my students; all they need is more practice and they will get better! As a teacher, I need to instill hope, not failure! Even when things are going super wrong, I need to steer the ship towards positivity and progress, not negativity and stalemates. It’s all about uplifting those around me and helping everyone learn! I packed up all of the materials and talked about my revelation with Eli. 

The work day was over (4:30pm) and it was time for the education department to conduct an assessment. Seeing as we wanted to get to volleyball, Eli and I packed our things and walked to the shop to buy water and two new drinks: Tam Tam Pineapple and Supa Flava Berries soda. Unsurprisingly, the Tam Tam pineapple was just as disgusting as the Tam Tam tropical. However, the Supa Flava Berries soda was quite good! It lived up to its name and indeed was a supa flava berry flavored!

I changed at my house and then went to Eli’s house to change. I took one for the team and finished the Tam Tam and Eli finished the Supa Flava. Eli technically promised to go play soccer with Mateyo today, but I think they talked and agreed they would play another day. With both of us in our exercise clothes, we walked over to the grounds and no one was there yet (they were all at the teacher assessment). We ran five laps around the soccer field today and enjoyed everything about the run besides the fact that our stomachs churned with sugary drinks!

When we finished our laps, people started showing up. We warmed up with our regular 1 v 1s until there were enough people to start the actual games. In between 1 v 1 rotations (we play to five points and leave if you lose), I played some hacky sack with Eli and Godfrey. I confirmed that my skills disappeared! I hope that before I leave or once I get back home, I can continue to practice and get better!

The games finally started and the problem with my team today was energy. As the games progressed, my team got lazier and energetic while Eli’s team got more energetic and active. I tried to shift the energy, but sometimes there’s only so much you can do! All of the beginners that joined us today did a great job (we call them “bamondas”) and the setter for Eli’s team, Tomsifu, was deadly on the net. Tomsifu technically hardly set as the setter, but made up for it in his spikes and lobs that always managed to find a hole in our defense. He also is pretty good at blocking and got me a couple of good times (he’s on the taller side and is able to block well). I noticed that Joseph VB wasn’t there today even though he told all of us to be here today extra, extra, early! By the end of the evening, the set score was 3-7 and we got wiped!

I helped take down the net (watch out for the rusty nails!) and partook in the small after game debrief. I walked back home, passed by Roza’s to get some hot water, made warm water back at the house, did NOT drop my phone, and took my bucket bath right as Joseph and Mboje were getting back from church! It was interesting to hear them in Joseph’s room as I bathed as the door didn’t lock and I was worried one of them might bust in! After the bucket bath, I got dressed and walked by myself to Eli’s house (Joseph and Mboje had already left). On the way, I noticed Alvin was hanging out in front of Roza’s house and thought that it would be fun if he came and hung out at Eli’s house with all of us. 

I held Alvin’s hand as we walked to the house. He was talking about all sorts of things, but I have no clue what! When we arrived Eli was getting dressed and since his door has quite the large crack, I had to block Alvin from peeking in! What proceeded for the next 30 minutes was pure chaos. First off, Alvin loves to be picked up and thrown around! However, the moment you put him down he yells “TENA, TENA, TENA!!!” which means, “AGAIN, AGAIN, AGAIN!!!”. Eli and I took turns throwing him up towards the ceiling so he could touch the light bulb. When we got sick of that, Alvin proceeded to get violent and try to fight both of us. To play into his fighting, Eli and I fake cried which made Alvin maniacally laugh! His laugh is hilarious and also a little scary!

Eventually he wanted to be thrown around again, but we refused. Like any other young kid, he began to pout and lay on the ground as if he were dead. Eli and I weren’t going to give into his tactics and I wanted to surprise him. There was an empty bucket of water inside of a storage room so I grabbed it and poured it on his head. I genuinely thought there was no water inside, but a good half a cup poured on his head (I wanted to just have a couple drops)! This of course caused him to start to wail. We dried him off, but he would not stop (I think water got in his ear)! It was not until I got on the ground and pretended that I was crying that he started to feel better. The idea of kicking and “beating up” a grown-up on the ground is quite funny.

Once Alvin was feeling better, we moved on to our final game of scaring. Eli would hide in his room, Alvin and I would whisper “Eliiiii”, and then Eli would roar and scare Alvin (he loves to be scared). At one point Eli hid underneath his bed and we explored around his room before Eli jumped up and scared us out! It was a ton of fun!

Soon enough there was a knock on our door, and to our surprise, it was Miraclin and Roza! They had come to hang out with us for the first time ever! The five of us went to the back room to find Mboje, Jordan, Leonard, and Joseph. We all hung around for a bit until Eli and I remembered back to our song from yesterday and began singing it. What transpired was beautiful for the next half an hour. We started by singing the song from yesterday and split up into different parts. I was with Mboje singing the bass, Eli was singing soprano/alto, Jordan on tenor, Miraclin on soprano, and Joseph kind of doing his own thing. Tomsifu played the piano and it was a fantastic time. Eventually the song that we sang yesterday was getting kind of boring, so we shifted the lyrics to just be “Asifiwe”! During the middle of the singing, Alvin was dancing around before getting snatched by the ear by his mom! I missed it, but it sounded hilarious!

Once we got split up into our parts, I gave Leonard my phone and it was time to film a music video! We did one take and it went amazing. Bass is way too low for me but I tried to make it work. To my surprise, Eli is a fantastic soprano and added a lot of harmony to our singing! Joseph was a soloist and frankly added a lot of variety and fun to the otherwise incredibly repetitive song. In the middle we had a little dance break and soon enough the entire video was over. 

Now that we were finished, I made sure to give Leonard the file so he could start editing it! The music of the night wasn’t over and Jordan hopped on the piano. He put on a beat that needed someone to rap over it and Joseph, Eli, Mboje, and I started rapping. Eli and I’s raps were nothing special (it’s hard to freestyle), but Joseph and Mboje were crazy in Swahili. I’m not sure if they were actually saying anything but it sounded pretty cool!

Eventually we were all quite tired and decided to sit down and talk. Unfortunately this just meant Miraclin getting harassed about marriage for what seemed like forever. Eli and I felt horrible, but there’s nothing that we can do. It’s all kind of headed by Joseph who seems to be the ring leader of the friend group. No matter how hard you try to shift the conversation, it goes right back to wanting to marry Miraclin. Eli and I could tell that it made Miraclin extremely uncomfortable as it sums up her worth as a human being to only be related to marriage. All of the marriage talks also have the connotations of sexual stuff as well which make it all the more terrible. It makes no sense, but perhaps it’s just the culture here around marriage. It seems odd to me, but that’s just how life is!

Thankfully the conversations ended as it was finally time for us to go eat at Roza’s place! When we first arrived there was a random man eating in the room, but he left after a bit. For dinner, we ate beans and rice from earlier today and it was fantastic as always! No heartburn or salt explosions! Towards the end of the meal Roza had a couple pieces of meat to eat. Since Miraclin does not eat beef (doesn’t like it), I got to eat two pieces. This ended up being quite the controversy to Eli as he thought I ate more than my share and I had to defend that I didn’t! When it comes to the “valuable” parts of the meal, it’s important that everyone gets their exact equal share. I realized that this was the first time in Bukimau I’ve eaten meat that isn’t fish! Hooray!

When the meal was over, Miraclin and I talked about the pitfalls of Kolibri and the possibilities of customizing the code to better fit VST’s needs. She has a degree in computer science after all so she knows what she’s talking about! If I had more time, I’m sure it would’ve been something fun to explore. Andrew ended up coming over to have Miraclin teach him and Roza more things about Canva. Eli and I were sitting on the couches, and to not disturb the teaching, texted to communicate. We came to the conclusion that we haven’t been very good guests the past week or so. We come in to eat, talk about home (or other things related to home or simply talk too fast for Roza to join in), make a huge mess with the food, say thank you, and leave. At no point have we been including Roza to the level we should have. Roza does so much for us and the least we can do is have her be a part of conversations and help when we can! Eli and I both promised that we would do our best to be more present with our conversations and focus on our time here, not home (with the end getting nearer and nearer, it’s hard not to). We want to make sure that Roza feels appreciated and involved!

With the new goal in our hearts, we decided it was time for us to go to bed. I walked to my house, got ready for bed, blogged, and went to sleep!